ACT ONE

Scene 1 - At Ayar and Alysar's Summer House in Greater Faydark....

Rucusman - Ok, wheres my Twinkie?
Gaelle - I dunno
Reorx - Me no eat
Dugann - Too fattening
Croesus - .........
Various other SoF - dunno, nada, not me...huh uh
Macaxe < with a mouth full of something > - Nummph Mee
< All eyes on Macaxe >
Mcling - if you didnt eat it Mac, then whats all the white creme on your beard?
< Sof members giggling queitly >
Macaxe < without hesitation > - Twinkie...twinkie...sorry twinkie..
Rucusman - Dang it Mac, i needed that twinkie for my new mystical super secret spell
< Gaelle and Alysar's eyes twinkle >
Macaxe - We can get another one..its just a twinkie...
Rucusman - Not like that! that was a special Mystical Twinkie, hence the MYSTICAL super secret spell, stupid dorf....
Mcling - Youre a dwarf also Rucusman...
Rucusman < blushing > - well, just so used to hearing you say it...
Macaxe - well, where can we get another mystical twinkie from?
Zydallon - Mystical Twinkies have always been extremely rare finds, the recipe has long since been lost in ancient texts and scrolls. Coming across another recipe, much less a Mystical Twinkie will be exponentially difficult.
< Reorx looks at Zydallon with a dazed expression >
Mcling - Its gonna be hard Reo...
Reorx - Me know that....... < Reorx sticks his tongue out at Mcling after Mcling turns his back, then stumbles into the adjacent room, the one incidentally with all Alysar's valuable Mistmoore China >
Gaelle - So what are we gonna do? Anyone have any idea where we can start looking for this recipe?
Croesus -.........
Zydallon - Well, we can check the Library in Erudin, it's the most comprehensive in all of Norrath..
< A grunt in the other room from Reorx is followed by a heavy stomp >
< Alysar begins to visibly sweat at the thought of the big dumb barbarian in the room with her mother's China >
Francoisl - Hey YEAH, Erudin, I have been meaning to go home...
Gaelle - Yeah, that dress is looking a tad ragged, need a new one...maybe a nice salmon, or cranberry colored one, they will go well with those slippers..
Francoisl - You think? I mean, HEY, leave my robes alone!! They are CASTER ROBES, not a dress, all casters wear robes, right Daconia?
Daconia - dont drag me in on this .... < incidentally wearing gossimer at the time >
Gaelle - is it one piece?
Francoisl - well, yeah
Gaelle - dress then, next topic...
Francoisl - IT IS NOT A....-Francoisl's argument is cut short by a glimmer in Gaelle's eye, and the sparkle of a spell forming around her hands, then a blast wrought from the heavens centers in on Francoisl, sending him sailing across the room into a Lay-Z-Elf recliner against the wall...
< Laughter ensues but is also cut short as the sound of glass shattering in the next room >
Alysar < sighing > - dammit... < runs into the next room, shouting > LOOK Reorx, a new SHINY is at the bottom of the swimming pool!
Reorx < eyes light up with a childlike glimmer > - SSHHHIIIINNNNYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!! < dives out of the window and splashes into the swimming pool in the back yard >
Alysar - ok, now..where were we..
Gaelle - Franc's dress..
Francoisl < moans in the chair, singed > - not...a...dresssss............ < passes out >
Dugann < rolls his eyes at Gaelle, then turns his attention back to the real conversation > - So do you think that the library will have any Twinkie info?
Zydallon - Im not sure, but it's as good of place as any to start.
< The group discusses the plan of action upon their arrival in Erudin >

Zydallon - I think we're good to go, Dac?
Daconia - Ready to fly, all aboard..
Zydallon - for God's sake, someone get Reorx before he drowns......

< After the small eternity of LOADING, PLEASE WAIT, our interpid adventurers arrive in Erudin.... >

Scene 2 - Erudin

Gaelle - Ive never been here before.
Zydallon - Its a wondrous city, full of magic and mystery. Its also confusing, so certain people need to stick close...
< All eyes turn to Reorx >
Reorx < looks innocent > - Me be good...promise...
Alysar - Ayar, you have on your Ro armor, maybe its shiny enough to keep Reo's attention so he wont get into any trouble....
Ayar - Why do I always have to babysit?
Gaelle - Why is the sky blue, why does Franc wear a dress, just the way it is...sorry Shiny Boy...
< Reorx's eyes light up at the word and he begins to look frantically for the "shiny" >
Ayar - Yeah, well, you're shiny too! Why cant you babysit the lug for a change?
Gaelle - I am allergic to stupidity......
Dugann - you are shinier, Ayar, take Reo down to the pier, maybe he would like to see the fish.
< Reorx's head snaps around at the word "fish" >
Reorx - Fish? Me loves the fishies...where tha fishies?
Ayar - I hate you all..... < leading Reorx, wanders towards the docks >

< The intrepid adventurers sans 2 make their way through the city and finally come to the Library of Erudin. >

Macaxe - I've never seen so many books in my life....
Rucusman - I didn't know you'd ever seen a book period..
Macaxe - HEY, I'll have you know I've seen a buncha books before, read a few of em too!
Rucusman - Really? Like what, Playdwarf doesnt count!
Macaxe - Hey, I look at it for the articles..really fascinating.. < eyes gloss over reminiscing >
Mcling - You need a moment alone Mac?
< Others giggle >
Macaxe < without hesitation > - No no no, just thinking about.......cakes...yes, cakes..
< Macaxe blushes again, and giggles ensue once more >
Zydallon - ok guys, let's get down to business, let's split up and look for the cooking section...

< Our Adventurers split up into a few groups: the McCrew, Gaelle and Alysar, Dugann and Zydallon, Daconia and Croesus, but Francoisl wanderes off by himself. >

Meanwhile, down at the docks...
Reorx - FISHIES!!!!!!! < splashes playfully in the water >
Ayar - I still hate you all.......

Back at the Library
Rucusman - AH HA!!!! Found Something..
< Adventurers dash to where the voice was and find the McCrew on eachothers' shoulders, like twisted carnival performers, trying to reach the top shelf. >
Dugann - What ya find, guys?
Rucusman - Not sure < grunting and stretching > Cant..reach it..
< Croesus reaches up over the 3 shorties' heads and grabs the book Rucusman is reaching at and hands it to him. >
Rucusman - Cooking with Magic.....thanks Cro
Croesus -.........
< The three dismount from their climbing positions and all gather around the table. Rucusman scans the pages of the book until his face lights up with delight. >
Rucusman - THIS IS IT!!!!

Meanwhile, down at the docks...
Ayar - Ok Reo, its been long enough i think, lets go find the others..
Reorx - NO! Fishes my friends, cant leave friends.....
Ayar < sighing and mumbling to himself > - Why do I always have to do this.... < then louder so Reorx can hear > Ok Reo, if you come now, ill sing the Happy Shiny Song and do the Happy Shiny Dance..
< Reorx whirls around, runs from the water and plops down in the sand in front of Ayar grinning like a kid on Christmas morning awaiting his loot. >
Ayar < losing all self respect, begins to sing >
I am the shiny one, yes its true
I a real shiny how about you? < pinches Reorx's nose >
I worked real hard to get my shiny stuff
Glad to have it, or I'd be in the buff! < bends over and shakes his shiny tush at Reorx, and Reorx giggles gleefully >
If you are good, and try real hard,
You can be as shiny as a bard!!!!  <covers his eyes as if a shiny bard is near >
< Reorx beings clapping along in time and swaying to the song. >
Ayar < getting into the song more, beings to sing louder >
YES I am the shiny one, yes ITS TRUE! < throws his arms out to his sides >
If you want to be shiny, here's what to do...
< A deep baritone enters Ayar's voice and it begins to carry into the streets, attracting the attention of people shopping. >
< Reorx giggles with excitement. >
Fight hard and strong, be brave and true... < pretends to draw a sword and swings madly as if in a MIGHTY battle >
You can be shiny, shiny shiny TOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOooOOOOO < ends the song with a Broadway flourish, sliding towards Reorx down on one knee, arms out to his side, chest out singing at the top of his lungs. Reorx cheers loudly and claps furiously at Ayar. >
< Ayar stands up, suddenly remembers where he's at, and looks around at the fifty some odd people there staring in awe and abject terror at the spectacle they had just witnessed. >
Ayar - oh dear Lord... < blushing so hard that his helmet turns a bright red, ducks his head and rushes toward a side street > Reo, lets go!!
< Reorx hops to his feet and runs to the water one last time, giggles to himself, as if he knows a secret that no one else does. >

Back at the Library....
Rucusman - It says here that the Mystical Twinkie is made of almost the same stuff that... < turns the page > normal twinkies are made from with a few exceptions. We need magical brownie legs, as opposed to normal brownie legs, I suppose, and < turns the page again > Aarrrgghghhh!!!!!
Librarian - Shhhhhhhhh!!
Rucusman - AAARRRGGGHHHH!!!!
Librarian - SHHHHHHHH!!!!
Zydallon - Rucusman, hush up and tell us what is the matter!!!!
Rucusman - There is a page missing!!!! I dont know what other special ingredients we need. I have most listed here, but, not all of them!
Gaelle - Well, what would happen if we just made it according to what we have there? Just use the ingredients from the regular recipe, think that will work?
Dugann - likely not
Mcling - if this spell botches like Rucusman's other spells, expect widespread chaos and destruction.
Rucusman - None of my spells have messed up THAT bad...
Mcling -Umm, remember the cake mix you tried that turned into the super aphrodisiac? Remember the bixies that picked it up after you threw it out?
Rucusman - eww, yeah...
Gaelle - I musta missed out on this, what happened?
Daconia - ever see what happens when you get a forestfull of horny bixies and a town full of unsuspecting skinny dipping halflings together?
Mcling - Rucusman is STILL not allowed back in Rivervale....
< Gaelle shudders >
Rucusman - ANYWAY, what do we do now?
Dugann - it's a library book, flip to the back and see who all has checked it out before we got here...
Zydallon - good thinking, amazing...its nice to meet a barbarian with more brain power than a paperweight...
Dugann - well, we're not all "challenged" the way some are...
< Ayar and Reorx come dashing into the library and Ayar slams the door shut behind them. >
Dugann - Speak of the devil....
Alysar - Why are you guys in such a hurry?
Reorx - Shiny Man did Shiny Dan...*Ayars hand claps over Reo's mouth*
Ayar < with a nervous laugh > - Just wanted to see you is all, honey...
Alysar < sounds dubious > - uh huh....
Ayar - well, what did you find?
Rucusman - We found a book with the recipe,but... < sniffs the air and wrinkles his nose > some pages are missing.
Dugann - we were about to flip to the back < looks around, sniffing also > , to see who all else had checked the book out.
< Rucusman flips it to the back and sees only one name written at the top, in illegible scrawl. >
Mcling - I cant make it out...good Lord what is that smell? < looks all around >
< Mcling passes the book around to everyone, each taking a moment to try to deciper the script, but to no avail. >
Zydallon, the last to get the book, shrugs and drops it. > Reorx < picks book up, glances at the writing > - Emperor Crush.
Dugann - What did you say? < covers his mouth and nose from a stench beyond words >
Reorx - words say "Emperor Crush"
Alysar - Are you sure? < covers her mouth and nose also > Yes, i see it now, its Orcish, i didnt recognize it.
Reorx - Me not dumb all the time.
Ayar - Just most right?
< Reorx nods.>
< Mcling sniffs around, hops down from the chair and sniffs his way around the table, and finally over to where Reorx is standing. He hops onto the chair, then climbs up Macaxe and stands on his helmet, pushing it down over his eyes.?
Macaxe - aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh CANT SEE! cant see!!
Mcling - Oh hush you big dummy, the smell, is coming from... < reaches up and snatches off Reorx's helmet, revealing the nearly dead fish concealed underneath, which Reo quickly snatches and clutches close to his chest >
Gaelle - Oh my..
Zydallon - UGH...
< Dugann covers his nose again,and various others groan in dismay and disgust. >
Reorx - FISHIE, MY FRIEND
Ayar < sighing yet again > - Reorx........
< The fish slips out of Reorx's grip and flops across the table. Reorx leaps into the air, trying to catch his "friend" but the fish slips away again and Reorx crashes through the center of the table, catapulting the fish into the air and across the library. >
Reorx < shouts >   - FIIISSSHHIIIEEE < hops up and runs in the direction of the near dead, now flying fish, but, as usual, doesn't watch where he is going and crashes into the first twelve foot shelf of books. >
< All the other SoF members watch in horror as the shelf teeters, then falls under Reorx's weight, crashing into the next shelf, which gives way and crashes into the next and so on until all the shelves have crashed onto their sides, dumping thousand after thousand of books onto the floor. >
Alysar - Oh, my........
Zydallon - Umm, Daconia.....
Daconia - Reading your mind Z, gather round everyone
Francoisl < suddenly dashes into the room with a bag under his arm and sees the mess > - What did i miss?
Daconia - No time, gather round, REO, LETS GO!
< Reorx digs madly through the books, finds his fish, stuffs it back under his helmet and runs to Daconia. >
Librarian - HEY, WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING?!? LOOK AT THIS MESS!!!!
Zydallon - sorry, send the bill to Shaorinor, he can take care of the WWHHHOOOOLLLE THING...
Librarian - STOP, YOU CAN'T....

< LOADING, PLEASE WAIT... >

< Our intrepid adventurers, after narrowly escaping the wrath of the all powerful Librarian, land in a peaceful glade in Greater Faydark. >

Scene 3 - Greater Faydark

Gaelle - Whew, fast thinking Dac..
Daconia - Thats why I'm paid the big plat..
Gaelle - hehe, hey Franc, where were you in all that mess?
Francoisl < tries desperately to hide the bag under his arm > - Umm, well < laughs nervously > I ummm......
Gaelle - whats in the bag Franc? hmmm?
< All eyes on Francoisl >
< Macaxe sneaks up behind Francoisl and snatches the bag from under his arm and runs back behind Mcling >
Francoisl - MAC!!!!
< Macaxe reaches into the bag and pulls out a chiffon number with frilly lace around the neck and cuffs. ?
Dugann - Ooh, Franc, nice < winks at Francoisl >
Francoisl - That's...that's.... for my mother!
Daconia - No, its ok Franc, its good to get in touch with your feminine side < begins giggling and doesnt stop until everyone is rolling on the ground with laughter >
< Francoisl turns a brilliant shade of red, almost matching the trim of the new dress and begins to recite a spell. >
< A thuderous flash lights up the sky and strikes Gaelle, singing her hair. >
< The laugher stops instaneously. The sky overhead, once bright blue, birds singing and chirping, becomes deathly quiet. Dark ominous clouds roll overhead, darkening the sky. Thunder crashes and lightning streaks across the sky. The wind picks up and leaves are blown into the air with violent gusts. >
< All the other SoF adventurers run in terror and hide behind the nearest wizzie spire. Alysar clutches Ayar, while Rucusman, Mcling and Macaxe grab onto one another, and Reorx holds his fishie tightly against his chest, all preparing for the imenent death of Francoisl. >
Gaelle - I hope you know....this means war.........
< Francoisl, just now realizing the trouble he's in starts to flee in terror as Gaelle begins to cast a spell. From the heavens, a blinding flash of lightning strikes Francoisl, sending him sailing into the air a dozen feet before crashing him back to the earth, where he skids to a stop on his face. >
Francoisl < looks back, charred and blackened > - Ok...... < woozy voice > maybe I was a liiiittle hasty....
Gaelle - No problem... < dark coulds disspate, birds return, Reorx's fishie is put back under his hat, and all is well... >

Rucusman - ok guys, I think we need to split up and try to gather the pieces that we need. I think the magical brownie legs can be found in my fav town of Rivervale.... needless to say, I wont be with that group..
Mcling - Oh, Im sure they'd love to thank you for the lovely afternoon you provided for them Rucusman...
< Macaxe snickers softly. >
< Rucusman glares at Macaxe, who promptly stops laughing. >
Rucusman - Like i was saying...Myself, Mac, Mcling, Daconia, Zydallon and Dugann will go to Crushbone and talk to Emperor Crush about the book, maybe he has some insight to the missing page. The rest of you, go to Rivervale and see if my hunch is right about the magical brownie legs. We will meet back at Aly's house in a day.
Zydallon - Seems like a plan....
All in unison - GO SOF!

< Ayar, Alysar, Francoisl, Gaelle, Croesus, and of course, Reorx port over to the Misty Thicket. >

Scene 4 - Misty Thicket

Alysar - Ok, i dont think we all need to go into town, we may cause alarm, a group of fully armored giant outlanders. Besides, no telling what they will think of Reo's friend.... < points at Reorx, who is walking at the back of the group, petting his fishing and whispering lovingly to it >
Ayar - Good plan, I think that Aly, Cro...
Gaelle < cuts Ayar off > - Reorx should stay out here, and since you seem to get along with him the best, Ayar, you sit out here on THIS side of the wall, we dont need him wandering around inside the town limits near the halfling homes.
Ayar - but.....
Alysar - Good plan G, lets go
Ayar - but.....
Francoisl - Sit tight Ayar, be back soon.
< Ayar sighs and plops down on a tree stump. >
< Reorx, totally oblivious to the entire conversation, is still whispering to the dead, smelly fishie. >
Ayar < grumbles softly to himself > - Why me? I am good. I'm a paladin. I'm a good guy, people like me, i take regular baths, fight pretty well, yet, I'm always reduced to this.... < glares over at Reorx, who is sitting on the ground indian style scratching his fishie's chin, talking gibberish to it >
Reorx - Mr Shiny Man....
Ayar < sighs > - Yes Reo?
Reorx - Can you do the Happy Shiny Song again?
Ayar - NO!
Reorx - Pease?
Ayar - No Reo. I've lost enough self esteem for one day, tell ya what, you sit RIGHT here, dont move, and I'll go out into the woods and find us some munchies, ok?
Reorx - Okie, get fishie friend moonchies too.
Ayar - sure Reo, sure... < jumps to his feet and dashes out into the thicket for a few blissful moments of silence.....and fresh air. >
< Reorx, sitting outside the Rivervale wall, on the wilderness side of the thicket, hears from his fishie that he is tired, so he puts the fishie to sleep under his hat, leaving Reorx without anything to do. >
< Reorx beings humming the Happy Shiny Song to himself, looking for stuff to keep him occupied, grabs up a rock from a nearby pile, and throws it with all his might over the wall. After a few moments an audible thump is heard when the rock strikes the ground well on the other side of the wall. >
< Giggling like a school child again, Reo grabs another rock and hurls it over the wall. >
< Meanwhile, Ayar wandering through the woods, comes across a goblin. >
Ayar - Hark! Evil beast, surrender thyself and all will go peacefully.
< The goblin screeches and hurls itself at Ayar, arms flailing madly. >
< Ayar, taken aback, draws his fiery sword from its special non-flammable sheath and prepares for battle. Before a blow can strike, out of the bushes bursts a halfling with a Zorro fixation and slays the goblin. >
Ayar - Pardon me, sir, that villan attacked me, I am more than capable of handling the situation.
< The halfling deputy says not a word, but the mysterious floating words above his head name him Deputy Asler. The halfling turns to go, but Ayar stops him with a hand on his shoulder. >
Ayar - HEY, dont turn you back on me. I was talking to you.
Deputy Asler - Time to die A Shiny Man!
< Asler draws his spear and takes a swing at Ayar! >
< Ayar, perplexed by the turn of events dances back out of the arc of the blade, but trips over a nearby root and falls, bum in the air. Asler takes the opportunity to jab Ayar swiftly in the rear with his spear. >
< With a yelp, Ayar is on his feet running from the mad butt stabbing Halfling. >
< Reorx, still tossing rocks and laughing gleefully, doesn't hear Ayar's cry for help and continues reaching back for rocks and tossing them. Ayar, thinking that the barbarian may be of some use, dashes to where Reorx sits. >
< Ayar, out of breath, tries to get Reorx's attention away from the flying stones to warn him of the approaching Deputy. Ayar, still winded, glances up and sees Asler within an arm's reach, spear upraised for a killing blow, when, without looking, Reorx reaches back for a rock, but grabs Asler's head instead. >
Reorx - ooh, soft rock, good grip....
< Reorx grunts and with a two step windup, tosses what he thinks is a "soft rock" high into the air, over the wall. >
< Deputy Asler's horrified, airborne cries echo throughout the Thicket as the little midget sails through the air. >
< Ayar, with a similarly horrified look, realizes what Reorx has just done. >
Reorx - ooh, screaming rock.. < chuckles to himself at his joke >
Ayar - Umm, Reo....that wasnt a rock....I suggest we get out of here, FAST.
Reorx - Not rock?
Ayar - No, not rock...
< Alysar and the rest of the crew come shuffling out of the tunnel and over to Ayar. >
Alysar - Hi guys, did you have a quiet afternoon?
< Commotion can be heard from the other side of the wall. >
Ayar - Umm, sorta, can we get out of here now?
< Commotion gets louder, shouts can be heard echoing on the other side of the wall. >
Gaelle - Don't ya wanna hear about how we got the brownie parts? < points to a charred and hobbling Francoisl >
Ayar < laughs nervously, looks around the other SoF'ers at the mob of Zorro-esque deputies that are pouring out of the tunnel > - I'm sure it's fascinating, tell me later, can we leave please?
< Various shouts from the mob - THERE THEY ARE!!! GET EM!!! DONT LET EM LEAVE ALIVE!!! >
Alysar - Oh my, looks like someone had an interesting afternoon..
Reorx - not me...me just throw rocks....
< Dozens upon dozens of halflings surround the Sword of Fate members, the situation looks bleak. >
Ayar - Umm, guys, we didnt mean anything it was an accident...
Reorx < shouts at the top of his lungs > - LOOK OUT!! BIXIE!!!!!!!!
<The halflings scream in horror, run madly in little circles then dive into bushes, dash behind trees, and leap over the wall (yeah, high jump, shoulda see them little guys) to escape their assailants. >
Gaelle - Franc, hurry, now!!
< Francoisl starts to cast the teleportation spell in the spare moment created by Reorx's diversion, and disaster is averted.......for the moment.>

< LOADING, PLEASE WAIT...>


END OF ACT ONE

To be continued......